Culture|Garage

In Chris’s post from a couple of weeks ago, readers, writers and other gawkers here at c|g clashed over the idea of Adam Corolla hosting Top Gear America. Some agreed that Corolla wasn’t the best choice for the series, others lauded NBC’s efforts, and thought Corolla would be the man for the job. I happen to disagree, and want to find out who you would cast if you were in the driver’s seat at NBC.

My arguement against Corolla was his complete lack of experience as an auto-journo, and the fact that he’s about as tasteless and bland as warm vanilla yogurt- hardly a representation of Americans, especially the car-loving set. Heck, without Jimmy Kimmel, he’s half a man (show). Ha. I hafta be honest, his brand of humor isn’t exactly svelte or subtle, and would fall flat in the face of the BBC’s dry, witty banter. The last thing I want to hear during a car program for the family is a joke that is obviously using adult themes as a context for comedy. If that is going to be injected, it must be like a stilletto, instead of the novelty baseball bat that Corolla will surely try to use in his pursuit of blending comedy and cars. That’s why Clarkson and the rest of the gang work- they all bring something to the table, both automotively and comedically. Obviously, a crack team of writers will be forced to work with journalists to script each show, and one can only hope that the camerawork and direction is half as good as the OG Top Gear’s, but I sincerely feel that a new lead (and cast, for that matter) will be necesarry to make Top Gear America a success. I say this, because although the cars are indeed the stars, it’s the human experience behind them that makes Top Gear better than Motor Week on PBS, although that is a fine program for facts and figures. Tanner Foust? Please. I have seen his work on Speed, and experienced hot-shoe he is not. Although I’m absolutely certain he could humble me at the track, he just doesn’t have that great flair for the dramatic that one needs for TGA. Mebbe as a star in a reasonably priced car, but that’s it. Oh, and the other guy is just too hipster-looking. He hangs sheetrock for Chrissake! No go on him. Thus, I give you my picks for the cast of TGA:

1. Peter Egan, writer for Road and Track. Egan is a masterful journalist and writer, and is really the American Clarkson, blessed with a superior intellect and fine brand of humor that both serves to entertain and inform, as all the best do. The author of zillions of columns and other publications, Egan is a deserving journalist who deserves top billing on Top Gear America. Recently, I finished reading his book, Side Glances, and found it an incredible journey through Egan’s experiences with cars. In the pages of his work, Egan takes the culture, the soul, the art that is the automobile and paints a pointillized picture that offers something from everybody. The man is intimately familiar with Lucas electrics, the silliness of nonfunctional scoops and spoilers and even the trials and tribulations of going racing- he is American automotive culture, incarnate. Besides being my favorite automotive journalist, he is on the same plane as one of my favorite authors- Roald Dahl, author of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, as well as Boy, and his writing is conversational, and allows you to experience the moment he describes to you- just as Egan’s does.

2. Rick Reilly, of Sports Illustrated fame. Besides being a talented writer, he also posesses a sense of humor akin to that of Egan. A veteran of sports journalism, Reilly will undoubtedly understand and enjoy the world of cars, and surely, motorsports. His writing is satirical, sometimes cynical and always heartfelt, inasmuch as he makes his points so that they make sense, not just to make them. Articulate, with a rapier wit, Reilly represents the finest in sportswriting, a skill that will make him a standout on TGA. The only issue? I dunno if Reilly is really an avid car guy or not. Mebbe I should ask.

3. Steve Magnante, writer for magazines such as Hot Rod, Rod and Custom, and Car Craft, among others. Magnante, known as “Magneto,” has a style all his own. An experienced writer and broadcaster, he will fill the shoes of co-presenter quite nicely, as he is roughly the same age as Richard Hammond and James May, and will showcase the more youthful side of TGA. Magnante is also an experienced builder, and has constructed-and raced- more than a few cars in his life. He is well-versed in American cars, and will most likely take to foreign makes just as well, although rarely has he offered commentary on them in the past- something careful writing and research will alleviate anyway. Magnante even looks the part, with thick-rimmed glasses and a unique style all his own. He will be able to trade barbs and insults with both Reilly and Egan handily, making the show entertaining, yet still distinctly American.

4. Boris Said as the Stig, or whatever they are going to call the mystery driver. He’s done it all, honestly loves cars, and is an excellent driver, among the top drivers in the country. I dunno if he looks good in white- but I guess time will tell.

Enough with my babbling, What say you? Who would you appoint to host the Colonial edition of Top Gear?

via: onebadwheel.com, bonediggers.com, newsday.com, topgear.com

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